Monday, January 29, 2018

Frankenhooker Movie Review

Frankenhooker is a 1990 horror movie/comedy directed by Frank Henenlotter and starring James Lorinz and Patty Mullen.

Jeffrey(Lorinz) is a young man who loses his fiancee Elizabeth in a lawnmower accident(yes, an accident with a lawnmower!!!)She is torn into pieces. He keeps her head with him. He talks to it and he decides to find other body parts for her. He is going to put her back together. He cruises around looking for hookers to kill. He meets some and he tells them that he needs a few of them. He meets their pimp Zorro and he tells them what he needs. Zorro is a dodgy guy. Jeffrey brews up some super crack and he gets the girls together. They party and they take his super crack. They start to explode. Jeffrey is surrounded by body parts. Zorro is waiting for his girls downstairs. Jeffrey gathers all of the body parts that he needs and takes them back to his lab.

He reanimates Elizabeth(Mullen) with electricity. She knocks him out and wanders off alone. She gets on the subway. Jeffrey wakes up and looks for her. Elizabeth is killing men by causing them to explode. Zorro sees her and she hits him. He punches her and harms her. Jeffrey finds her and he takes her back home. He reanimates her again and this time she is Elizabeth, not the monster she was. She asks him what has happened. He tells her and she is horrified. Zorro finds Jeffrey and he kills him. All of the body parts in Jeffrey's lab come to life and form some sort of monster. They attack Zorro and drag him away. Elizabeth works on Jeffrey and she brings him back to life. He is amazed that he is back until he realises that she has made him with female body parts. He is a monster.

This is a weird movie but when you think about it, the same director made Basket Case, so you know what you are going to get! I liked this because it made me laugh. It is cheap and nasty in parts, but it is fun. There are some hilarious moments such as the exploding hookers which make this worth a look. If you enjoyed Basket Case, I think that you will enjoy this. It is not a great movie by any means, but it will make you laugh. I will give it a 4/10.

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

The Legacy Movie Review

The Legacy is a 1978 horror movie directed by Richard Marquand and starring Katherine Ross,Sam Elliott and Roger Daltrey.

The movie starts with a couple, Maggie(Ross) and Pete(Elliott). They have gotten a job in London, decorating the house of a man who they haven't met. They are living in Los Angeles but they decide to travel to England. When they arrive, they almost get hit by a big limousine. A man gets out of the car and helps them. He invites them back to his house for tea. His name is Jason Mountolive(John Standing) and he has a huge house called Ravenhurst. Pete's motorbike was damaged in the collision so they have to stay the night until they can get it fixed. They meet other guests of Jason's. There is 
Clive Jackson(Daltrey), Karl Liebnecht, Maria Gabrielli, Barbara Kirstenurg and Jacques Grandier.

While Pete is out trying to find a mechanic, Maggie looks around the house. Maria goes for a swim in the pool and she is drowned, even though she is a great swimmer. Pete and Maggie talk about what happened. They decide that they should leave. Jason wants to see Maggie. He is very ill and close to death. All of the others have a ring on their fingers and Jason offers one to Maggie too. She puts it on and then it won't come off. She tries everything, but it is stuck. Pete is very worried about what is going on and he wants to leave. He tries to call someone to get a car but he can't get through on the phone. They have to stay. The police arrive and nobody can leave. Jason's nurse is wandering around and she tells Pete that he has to stay.

Pete and Maggie grab a horse and ride into town. They go to the local mechanic and find that Pete's motorbike hasn't been fixed. They take the chauffeurs car and drive away. They end up going around in circles. Maggie is having second thoughts about leaving. The car stops working and they have to go back to the house. Maggie asks Jacques if they are all involved in black magic and he tells her that they are. Clive starts to choke and he chokes to death. Maggie finds a portrait that looks exactly like her. The woman is Lady Margaret and she left her powers to Jason. She wrote a book. Karl gives it to Maggie to read. Karl ends up being burned to death. Maggie finds newspaper clippings about the guests and things that they have done.

Pete sees the handyman feeding Karl's charred remains to the dogs. He tells Maggie about it. Maggie realises that Jason is punishing all of the group for what they have done wrong. Barbara is the next to die. Maggie begins to get anxious about it all. Pete tries to calm her down. Next day, Pete goes outside and Jacques starts shooting at him. He ends up dying when his gun explodes in his hands. Maggie discovers that she is related to Jason and that she was brought to the house to claim her inheritance. She goes up to talk to Jason. He tells her that he has passed his powers onto her and that she needs to find six souls and kill them. He tells her to pass on her legacy to the sixth person as he did with her. Pete looks for Maggie and he finds her with Jason. He wrecks the place and kills Jason. Maggie tells him that it is all over and they find a white cat who was wandering around. Is it the nurse who was around the house too? Maggie is the new owner of the house and she has taken over from Jason. She gives Pete a ring which he accepts. They kiss.

This was a good movie. I liked the cast. Ross was good in the lead role and Elliott was good also.
I liked seeing Roger Daltrey in a minor role. This is more of a mystery than a real horror,but there are some spooky scenes. There isn't anything too scary though. It is a real Sunday afternoon movie, which I do like. It was a solid mystery which kept me watching until the end. I recommend this one. It is worth a look. I give it a 6/10.

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Twin Peaks, The Return, Finale

So, to the final episode of this great season of Twin Peaks. Things gets very strange in this episode and we wouldn't expect anything else from David Lynch.

We are taken to the Black Lodge where we see evil Cooper who is on fire for some reason. Mike creates a new Dougie Jones and he sends him back to his family. Cooper is with Laura in the woods when she disappears  after screaming. Where did she go? Cooper finds himself in the Black Lodge and he meets Mike. He sees that Laura is not there. He talks to the arm and then she shows up and tells him something before disappearing with a scream once again. Leland is there and he tells Cooper to 'find Laura'. Cooper ends up at Glastonbury Grove and he meets Diane. They look at each other, wondering if they are the real people and not doppelgangers. They are.

They drive off together. Cooper is looking for something. They stay over at a motel where they have sex. Cooper wakes up the next morning and she has gone. He finds a note from a woman called Linda and it is addressed to Richard. It says that he is not to look for her. Cooper leaves and continues his journey alone. He arrived in Texas and goes into a diner called 'Eat at Judy's'. He asks the waitress if there is another waitress working there. She tells him that there is , but she is on her day off. Cooper has an altercation with some cowboys and he comes out on top, then leaves after getting the address of the waitress.

Cooper comes to her house and when the waitress answers the door we see that she looks exactly like Laura Palmer. She says that her name is Carrie Page. Cooper tells her that he will take her back home to Twin Peaks. She agrees and packs some things. They leave in the car together. They arrive in Twin Peaks, but Carrie doesn't look as if she knows any of it.  They go to see Laura's mother, Sarah, but when they knock on the door, a stranger answers it. She says that her name is Alice Tremond. Cooper asks her about Sarah Palmer, but she doesn't know her. She says that she bought the house from Mrs. Chalfont. Cooper and Carrie go away and they don't know what has happened. Cooper wonders what year it is. Suddenly, Carrie looks at the house and hears Sarah Palmer calling Laura. She looks terrified and screams. The lights go out in the house. The episode ends with Laura in the Black Lodge whispering something in Cooper's ear.

The finale was weird. It didn't make a lot of sense. But, saying that, I enjoyed it. I liked the inclusion of Laura Palmer in the final episode. It was fitting that she was there with Cooper at the end. This episode raised so many questions. What happened to Laura? Where did she go? Who is Carrie? Is she Laura? Did Carrie remember when she heard Sarah calling her? So many unanswered questions. I hope that this will come back for another series  and explain what that all meant. I won't hold my breath though! This series was great. I loved it. I loved being back in Twin Peaks once again after so long. I loved seeing some of my favourite characters back again and I liked seeing Cooper in his many forms. Kyle MacLachlan was great in this series. He played three different characters which is not easy. He was the star of the show, I think. I would love to see more of this new Twin Peaks universe and I hope that we might get that chance in the future. I am a die hard Twin Peaks fan and I can wait for another series. Hopefully, it won't be another 25 years though!

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

The Monster of Piedras Blancas Movie Review

The Monster of Piedras Blancas is a 1959 horror movie directed by Irvin Berwick and starring Les Tremayne, Forrest Lewis and Jeanne Carmen.

The movie beings on the beach. Constable Matson(Lewis)finds bodies there. The shop owner talks about the legend of the monster of Piedras Blancas and hints that that is what happened to the dead people. The lighthouse keeper is called Sturges and he has a daughter called Lucille(Carmen). The constable asks him some questions. Dr. Jorgenson(Tremayne) does an autopsy on the bodies and he says there were severed heads. Meanwhile, the shopkeeper is scaring everyone who comes into his shop by telling them about the monster. He is warned not to by the constable. Lucille walks along the beach at night and goes swimming. Something is watching her. She tells her father. He is mad because he doesn't want her on the beach at night.

The shopkeeper meets the monster and he gets it. He is found dead. The cops discover a gill from a fish. It is from some prehistoric creature. Lucille finds her father injured. Their dog is also missing. The locals want to look in some caves down by the beach. Lucille's boyfriend, Fred wants to look in the caves also. She doesn't want him to. They argue. The monster is turning up in the tow. The constable takes a posse of locals with him and they look for the creature. They find a severed head on the beach. They hear shots. Lucille asks her dad about the caves. He tells her that he was in the cave years ago and he saw some creature. He left fish for it and keep it alive. He feels responsible for it.
 Fred looks for the creature. It's from the sea. It is like a reptile. Fred wants to take it alive. They are going to set a trap for it.

The monster comes out and he sees Lucille. It breaks into her house.  The constable is worried about Lucille. Fred calls Lucille but there is no answer. He goes to the lighthouse. The monster has Lucille.
The others come and fight the monster. They try to trap it but they can't. Fred tells them to turn on the strong light in the lighthouse and the creature is dazzled. Fred knocks him off into the sea. The end.
This was a fun film. It was pretty simple, but it was good. I liked the story and it was fun to see the monster when it did appear. This was great for 1959 and I would certainly recommend it if you enjoy monster movies. This is an entertaining movie with not much in the way of scares, but I don't think that it matters at all. I give this one a 7/10.

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Twin Peaks: The Return, Episode 17

This episode begins with Gordon, Albert and Tammy who discuss Diane and what happened. Gordon tells them about Judy and Phillip Jeffries. Major Briggs came to him with knowledge of this entity which they called Judy. Cooper knew too. Dougie's boss calls Gordon and tells him of Cooper's message. The message says that he his heading to Twin Peaks Sheriff station. At the station, Naido is making weird noises as someone comes near. James and Freddie are still in the jail as is Chad and a drunk guy. It is revealed that bad Cooper is outside the station and that is why Naido is upset. He is masquerading as Cooper. He meets Lucy, Andy and Sheriff Truman. He mistakes Frank for Harry.
The real Cooper calls Frank on the phone while the bad Cooper is sitting in his office.

Bad Cooper realises what is happening and he pulls a gun on Frank. Lucy shoots him. Cooper warns Frank not to touch the body. The real Cooper arrives with the Mitchum brothers in tow. BOB has been released from bad Cooper's body and he attacks the real Cooper. Freddie steps in and he blasts BOB and kills him once and for all with his huge fist. The real Cooper puts the owl ring on bad Cooper's hand and the body disappears into the Black Lodge where it belongs. Cooper gets the key to the room in the Great Northern. He knew that he would have it. Gordon shows up with Albert and Tammy and Diane turns up too.

Cooper,Diane and Gordon go to the Great Northern and look around. They find the door in which the key fits and Cooper says that he has to go alone from here. Cooper enters the room which is dark and he sees Mike. Cooper meets Phillip Jeffries and they talk. He tells Cooper to remember. Cut to 1989 and Laura Palmer who is meeting James Hurley.  We see a scene from Fire Walk With Me where Laura tells James that she loves him and jumps off of his bike. Cooper is watching all of this. Before she meets Leo, Jacques and Ronette, she meets Cooper who takes her and tells her that they are going home, stopping her death. Cut to Twin Peaks on the day after and we see Josie Packard from the very first episode of Twin Peaks. Laura's body is not washed up on the shore. In present time, Sarah Palmer smashes a photograph of Laura and goes crazy. Cooper thinks that Laura is with him, but she disappears with a scream. The episode ends with Julee Cruise singing 'The World Spins' in the Roadhouse.

This was a great episode. I loved it. It was so interesting and it started tying up some loose ends. I knew that there were not going to be any real answers, but I loved the parts with Laura in them and it was great to see Julee Cruise once again.

Saturday, January 13, 2018

Absurd Movie Review

Absurd is a 1981 horror movie and a sequel to Antropophagus. It is directed by Joe D'Amato and stars George Eastman and Annie Belle.

The movie begins with a man being chased. A priest is after him and the man gets impaled on some railings. He arrives at a woman's house with his insides dangling.He is brought to the local hospital where he is patched up. Seargeant Engleman goes to see the woman, Mrs Bennett and asks her questions about the strange man. The cops see a man on the road.He says that he is a tourist and they asks him questions. Engleman gives the man a lift. They end up at the hospital. He finds Drachmas in the weird man's pocket. He is healing really well. He awakens. The tourist guy looks at him and the man freaks out. Engleman asks the tourist what is going on. The man attacks the nurse and he escapes. Engleman finds the nurse dead and realises that the man is on the loose.

Engleman and the tourist guy, who turns out to be a priest talk to the doctor and look at x-rays of the man's brain. His name is Mikos(Eastman) and he has healing powers. He can heal his own body. The priest tells them that he was made that way after an experiment. He also went insane after it. The priest wants to kill him. The only way to do it is to kill his brain. Mikos wanders around and he kills various people in horrible ways. Engleman and the priest are going to scour the place looking for him before he kills more people. They know that they need to kill him. Mikos is walking along the road when he gets knocked down by a car. The driver of the car is Mr. Bennett, the husband of the woman who saw Mikos in the beginning. He goes home, leaving Mikos on the road.

Mr.Bennett is going out with his wife. The babysitter comes and there is a nurse from the hospital, Emily(Belle),there to look in on the Bennett's daughter, Katia who has a problem with her spine and is confined to her bed. There is a son there too. Mikos is on his way to the house and he kills the babysitter and he kills Emily by sticking her head in the oven. Before she dies, Emily sends the son out to get help. Katia tries to get out of her bed. He sees her and tries to kill her. She stabs him in the eyes. He stumbles around trying to get her. The priest finds the house and sees Mikos. Katia and Mikos struggle. She picks up an axe and she swings it at his neck again and again. The cops show up and see Katia covered in blood, holding the severed head of Mikos.

I enjoyed this movie. It was a decent horror movie with some very bloody scenes which isn't a bad thing! I don't really see how it fits as a sequel to the other film, but it doesn't really matter, I guess.
The movie was a video nasty and I can see why people who don't like horror movies would object to it, but to those of us who love horror, this is an entertaining movie with a great ending. I recommend this and I will give it a 6/10.

Thursday, January 11, 2018

Twin Peaks: The Return, Episode 16

This episode begins with bad Cooper and Richard Horne.Cooper has coordinates and he is looking for a particular place. He takes Richard with him to find what he is looking for. Jerry Horne is wandering around and he sees this. Richard ends up finding something and getting electrocuted and he disappears. Cooper is trying to send a text message to someone. The good Cooper is in hospital, in a coma. Hutch and Chantal are waiting outside Dougie's house when they get into an argument with one of the neighbours. He pulls out a gun and shoots the two of them dead.

Mike appears in Cooper's hospital room and he tells him that he is awake. Cooper finally wakes up and Mike informs him that there is a bad version of himself running around. Mike hands him the owl ring and Cooper hands Mike some of his hair and tells him to make another one. Janey E and Sonny see Cooper awake. He borrows a gun and he gets the Mitchum brothers on the phone. He gets them to arrange a flight for him to Washington. He leaves his family at the casino. He also leaves a note for Gordon.

Cut to Diane who receives a message from bad Cooper. She tells Gordon that 3 or 4 years after Cooper left town, he showed up at her place. He raped her and asked her questions about FBI stuff.
She sent him coordinates. She tries to shoot Gordon but she gets shot by Tammy and Albert. She disappears into the Black Lodge. It turns out that she was a doppelganger too. Mike destroys her.
Cooper meets the Mitchum brothers and he tells his family that he has to go it alone. He says that he will be back. He tells the brothers that he needs to get to Twin Peaks. Eddie Vedder performs a tune at the roadhouse. Audrey does a dance and seems to go into a trance. She asks her husband to take her home and then it seems as if she is in some sort of hospital room or something.

This episode was very good. It is interesting to see Audrey and we wonder what sort of situation she is in. Is she is an institution or a hospital? We don't know. It was great to see Cooper finally come back and it was such a great moment when he went from Dougie to the Cooper that we love.

Tuesday, January 9, 2018

The Shortcut Movie Review

The Shortcut is a 2009 horror movie directed by Nicholaus Goossen and starring Drew Seeley, Shannon Woodward and Dave Franco.

The movie begins in 1945 at Hartley High School. A couple take a shortcut through the woods. The boy gets a bit rough with the girl and he rapes her. He leaves her in the woods. A kid comes along and sees her. She asks him for help but he just hits her with a rock and kills her. Cut to present day and a kid called Tobey goes through the shortcut when he is dared by his friends. He finds a dead dog there. He sees an old guy and gets frightened. He goes home where he finds his brother, Derek(Seeley) and his friends Lisa(Woodward) and Mark(Franco). They see him covered in blood.
Tobey tells Derek what happened. A guy called Taylor finds out what happened with the dog and he tells Derek that his dog went missing and he wants to find out if his dog was taken by the old guy in the woods. He tells Derek that they will go and have a look around the old guy's place.

Derek's mother tells him about the shortcut. People disappeared in there. One of the Hartley were suspects. The son was called Ben and he was a problem child. The old man is the last of the Hartley's.
Taylor and Derek go the the shortcut and they see the old man. They run to his barn and look around. They find loads of dogs tags there. Harley realises that they are there. He chases them. They get away. Taylor thinks that Hartley is killing dogs. Lisa wants to investigate it too as well as Derek's love interest, Christy(Katrina Bowden). They all spy on Hartley. He shows up at Derek's work and spooks him. Cut back to the 1940's and Ben Hartley kills someone. The dad knows and he shoots a witness to the crime. Back to present day, Derek watched Hartley while the others look around his  place. Lisa sees newspaper clippings. They break into his house. He has a schoolroom in his house and he has jars with animal parts in them.

Taylor and Mark look in the basement. There is an old man chained to a bed. He asks them for help.
They let him out. The guy is a killer and he murders Mark and Taylor. Hartley comes back and he shoots at them. Derek shows up and he and Lisa look around. They fall into a pit of bones. Hartley finds them but Derek hits him and they run off. The old guy has Christy chained and he kills her in front of them. Derek tries to fight him. Lisa helps. Hartley stops Derek. Cut to 1955 and the older Hartley brother comes home and finds Ben chained up. The father has been covering for him. The two old guys are the Hartley brothers.  The old Ben is shot by his brother. The brother then shoots himself in front of Derek and Lisa. Derek's brother Tobey shoots Lisa dead. Derek drags her body away. Derek and Tobey are killers who murdered their own dad.

This was a fun movie. I liked the actors and the story wasn't bad. The ending was a little so so but I could forgive that. I enjoyed watching it and it was fun trying to figure out who the killer is. This is nothing new really, but you could watch a lot worse so I would say that if you enjoy middle of the road horror movies, then this will be worth your while. It kept me watching so I will give it a 6/10.

Sunday, January 7, 2018

Twin Peaks, Season 3, Episode 15

This episode begins with Ed and Nadine. She tells him that he can be with Norma. He goes to see Norma and tells her that he is finally free. He asks her to marry him. Bad Cooper is driving  along when he meets a ghost. He tells the ghost that he i looking for Phillip Jeffries. He is led to a room and he meets Jeffries who is not in his body. He asks him why he sent Ray to kill him. He also asks him ie he called him but Jeffries denies it. There is a flashback to Fire Walk With Me and a scene with Gordon, Cooper and Jeffries. He asks him about Judy. Cut to Cooper in a phone box. Richard Horne pulls a gun on Cooper. It turns out that his mother is Audrey Horne.

Cooper beats him up and puts him into his truck and drives off.  Cut to the Roadhouse and James is having an affair with a married woman. Her husband isn't too happy and he beats him up. Freddy comes along with his super fist and beats the guy up. They are taken to jail. They see Naiko. The Log Lady calls Hawk and says that she is dying. She gives him some clues and she says goodbye to him. He says goodbye to her and he tells everyone that she has passed on later. Everyone has a moment of silence for the Log Lady. The episode ends with Audrey ad Charlie who are going to the Roadhouse. She tells him that she hates him. There is music and the episode ends.

This episode was good with some good scenes with bad Cooper. The passing of the Log Lady was very sad and it is even sadder as the actress who played her died in real life too. She was a great character and so recognisable to Twin Peaks fans everywhere.
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